I consider my career as an entertainer a privilege, I feel truly blessed God allows me to be in this industry, but being a public figure comes with many perks and some crazy experiences. I am a natural people magnet a very friendly individual, this has helped me open many doors in my life.
When I first started I thought I would always be surrounded by famous friends and people who wanted nothing but the best for me, but soon I realized that most characters who came close wanted to get in my pants, often with business proposals that offered very little or nothing of benefit, these individuals could not get their hands off of me, they just had the desire to be with me in bed.
For years, I had a love hate relationship with myself, unable to understand if it was ok to attract people in animalistic ways, or if I should cover up, and even wanted to become invisible. Then there was the industry, I was too short for some projects, too thin or too ethnic for others, I developed a personality dysmorphic disorder, I felt so embarrassed, ashamed and anxious that I avoided many social situations.
This is when I found the light at the end of the tunnel, the answer to my mind troubling questions. Whenever I attended events, I did it with a close friend who I could trust. Then came the realization that it is ok to incite the cravings of others towards my persona, but I had to do it by having a very small circle of friends who would guide me with kind words, who care about me, and who understand the real me in front and behind the spotlight. I treasure those who celebrate my success and are also there when things go in directions out of my control.
Now I can count my circle of relatives and friends with one hand, I spend all the time I can with my husband, I nurture my relationship with confidants and maintain a healthy relationship with industry contacts. As for those third parties who want to take advantage of me, I weed them out with caution, not everyone has my best interest.